ICE PUCK UNIVERSITY

 PUCKARRHEA

 There is life inside

a Hockey Puck

research by Dr. Johnny Puck

 

 


It has been made to my attention that several hockey players and hockey fans may have been experiencing the early symptoms of Puckarrhea. My sources for such information must be kept confidential at this time. Puckarrhea is the name that I have called this latest sports affliction.

The Puckarrhea virus possibly could have originated from a contaminated substance or container used to freeze hockey pucks. It is quite feasible that an unknown liquid was was accidentally released into the pucks, thus creating the puckarrhea germ. This is only one possible explanation, but indeed, this needs to be explored in detail under strict laboratory conditions. Too much hockey, either participation or spectator, may also allow the explosion of mental diarrhea to occur.

It could also be possible that intimate contact with the infected pucks are causing the newly developed puckarrhea outbreak that is infesting hockey players and fans world wide.

The best relief, as of now, is too try to wean the individual off hockey for just a few weeks until their sanity goes back to normal. Please note that this assumes that the person in question is already normal and may not work on the mentally dis-advantaged. I know that this is going to be real hard for die-hard hockey fans, but it must be done. Hopefully, I can receive funding to explore this phenomenon in more detail and report back to you at that time.

 IPUCKU HOME  

 JOHNNY PUCK

PUCKOLOGY 101      PUCKARRHEA

 


PUCKARRHEA: a delusion of an explosion of hockey pucks emitting out of a bodily orifice.


Early symptoms of Puckarrhea include:

  • dreaming of hockey pucks exploding

  • dreaming of being a hockey puck

  • seeing hockey pucks in your coffee

  • hearing noises emitting from puck

 

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